#02 The 20s Life Survival Guide: 2017 Was Tough, 2018 Is Gonna Be Liberating

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This is 31st of December, the last day of 2017, which means tomorrow 2018 will begin.

It almost unbelieveable how fast the time flies. Feels like it was yesterday I celebrate my 22nd birthday with my loved ones in January this year, I decided to go wandering, starting a new journey as a jobseeker in the capital city. Being far away from home and my parents. Decided to go and live separately with my bf (which we never did, and never thought before).


It’s unusual for me to reflect for what I’ve been through in a year. Yes, yes, my life in several years was wasted. I never learned anything from the past (but not really, cause I did learned little things in life, or I would be ended as a loser now. Or am I?)

Many things happened in 2017, and in general, I can conclude that: 2017 WAS A REALLY TOUGH YEAR. I summarize my journey in 2017 as below.

The Beginning of 2017

  1. As a fresh grad, I decided to go for a job seeking journey to big cities where (people think) hold much of opportunities. I went to Jakarta armed only with my diploma, resume, and clothes in my suitcase. I flew away from my home, leaving my parents, my best friends, and boyfriend. First I thought that’ll be an awesome journey, I leave with joy and confidence. I leave without thinking how hard It’ll become.
  2. Gradually, one by one my friends were getting job. It’s kinda frustrating and knocking me down.
  3. I stayed in different families’s houses. My step sister’s, and my distant relative’s. I was tried to figure out the most comfort place to stay, and now I know I’ve doing wrong with that.
  4. My mom and my best were came to the city. I was waiting for the call from a company (that I was positive will  hire me), but they never call. So sad, but I’m okay. Really, being a jobless is not really stressing for me.

The Middle of 2017

  1. Le BF was hired in a state owned entreprise. He got to go to the military service hold by the company. I lost contact with him for almost 1 month along his study in the corporate university.
  2. Another job interview, and this time, they’re really hiring me. I was back to my hometown in Ramadhan till Eid. Visited my BF’s home for the first time (after 7 years of relationship, lol), and thank God, his family are so warm and kind.
  3. Another good news came from Le BF. He got placed for work in Bandung. Not so far from me, in Jakarta. That was what I’ve been prayed for that time. Then I just started my new job in a media company, after a big struggle whether to pick this opportunity or not. Finally I choose to pick it, but my mom seemed not likey.
  4. The funiest part is: I choose the resignation just before signing the contract. Simply because the contract didn’t match with my future plan: taking postgraduate study (as my mom really want me to do so.)
  5. Became a jobless again, I moved to Bandung, the place where I feel more homey than Jakarta, besides I near to Le BF. But sadly it’s just last for a month. My mom was half forcing me to apply to a startup company where my distant cousin work. We’re involved in a fierce debates about that, that finally I followed mom’s desire.
  6. I started a new journey in a startup company, and finally I FELL IN LOVE with this company (oh, it’s not a company, it’s a movement) with their noble values to empower the youth. I finally changed my mind about what a job should be. No, what a career should be.

The Ending of 2017

  1. After 3 months working. My distant cousin, she finally decided to rent a room near the office together with her best mate in the office. We knew it really exhausting because the distance form the house to the office, and the common transportation is sucks here in this city, and don’t force me to write about the traffic here in Jakarta, please no. Luckily I got a roommate to rent a room near the office, cuase the room is quite expensive, and I thought my salary can’t cover my life in a month by renting a room alone.
  2. Struggling again with feelings of uncertainty about the significancy of my presence in the company, am I really needed here? Also feelings of uncomfortness with some of colleagues, sometimes I felt like they don’t like me, but I don’t know why, there’re no clear yet logical reason.
  3. Met with 2 new people in le office. One became my room mate, and another one now substituting me as her room mate. These 2 girls has really inspired me, they finally gave me courage to take decision in my life. These two free spirited young lady that also have the similar struggles with mine.
  4. Finally told to Le Boss about my resignation in the end of December. I finally be opened to him about what I feel during working there. I’m glad he’s so supportive. He embraced me and listened to my thoughts.
  5. They held a farewell dinner for me, we’re playing secret santa, it was a sad yet fun night. That night I felt relieved and happy, not because I’ll leave the company, but the courageous and insights I got. I’ll never forget them. No matter what has happened in the past.
  6. The distant relatives which their house I stayed in, talking about me behind my back. It’s a normal thing, but still I don’t like it. I think it’ll be better if they tell me straight forward if I do wrong or anything else. But they just talking behind me, and sadly what they talked about me all completely a shit. Yes, that’s the risk of staying in relatives’s house
  7. In the end of this year, after decided to resign from this job, I got many job offers (so grateful) from several companies. I refuse all. I've made my decision to continue my study. It's not arrogance, it's commitment.

Lessons Learned in 2017

Bunch of lessons!!! Maybe it takes a whole year to explain too. In summary they are:
  1. I need to learn more things. My knowledge and skills are just not enough to face the world’s demand.
  2. I’ve been wasting the last 7 years of my life doing nothing worthwile. I was forgetting my passion, ambition, and goals. I lose myself. And finally I find my self back in the end of 2017 due to all experiences I through.
  3. The quarter life crisis is real. Being a 20 something is not easy at all. The world after graduation is tough and you need to be well prepared.
  4. Fortune is all in the God’s hand. He has planned the best thing for you, all you need is to believe in Him. Be patient of the waitings. Every creature have it’s own fortune, so no need to mind another’s. No need to be jealous to anyone else’s achievement. You have your own too!
  5. As a nomad who stay in your realtive’s house, you have no right to choose. Pay attention to your manners. But no matter how hard trying to be a good one, they will always can find your mistake.
  6.  Pay attention to your mental’s health. Don’t overthink to what people think or say about you. Remember, THEIR OPINION DOESN’T DEFINE YOU. Go out, do anything you want, and be anything you want.
  7. Different values in life are inevitable, and it’s okay to have different values and point of view about life and career with the others. Pushing people to understand you is useless. But I swear you’ll find someone who understand you.
  8. Be less complaining, and be more grateful. You have recieved a lot of happiness, and all the hard stuffs all this time are just make you stronger.
  9. You need sincerity to let go. You can’t get or handle everything. Sometimes you need to let go something to chase something bigger. You can’t handle things at once (if you can, it’s good, but don’t push yourself too hard) or you’ll ended losing everything.
  10. There's no place better than your home. Whatever it likes, wherever it placed. You might happy living in a big mansion, but without the loved ones? NAH.
  11. It's good to pursue your super unusual dreams, but your family (I mean your real family), will always hoping for the best thing to happen with you. They may not like your dreams or not agree with your opinions, but everything's just because they want to protect you (learned it from COCO, haha.) 
  12. Don’t push yourself to fulfill the stereotypes or people’s happiness and success standard, you can make your own standard, it’s okay not to be similar. Just keep yourself walking in the right path.

Yes, 2017 WAS TOUGH YET MEANINGFUL. So much things I learned (more than brief 12 points above). 2017 has made me stronger. 2017 has found me. 2017 was bit, sour, and less sweet.
I’m ready for 2018. It must be liberating since lot of hard stuffs I’ve been struggling in 2017. 2018 must be awesome! (filling my mind with positives vibes).

Thank you 2017!

Sincerely,
Sarah.

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